Wisdom: the most difficult language

Sometimes I wish I could understand the situation of others around me a little better. In my many circles of association I know widows, divorcees, people who have lost a parent either to death or suicide, wards of the state, physically challenged, and so forth. Every obstacle we face in life plays some part in why we do things the way we do them. The least bit of discouragement one day can turn to years of negative decisions...or positive ones. But as a whole, the human race fails to understand each other. I suppose to know where people come from, you'd have to have been where they've been. I have no desire to go through the pain some people I know have had to brave. But I do reflect on this. I think it would help me better interact with others. I guess that's where the essence of selflessness comes in. We will be selfless in some situations because we feel people have a valid excuse for certain behavior--i.e. Their father was abusive, therefore they tend to be reserved in human interaction vs. She's reserved, I bet she thinks she's too good to talk to us. The second situation demands some value of self that deserves a certain reaction, in this case attention. I would have loved to have met Mother Teresa while she was alive. I can only imagine how many times people bit at her about something or treated her unfairly and she just continued serving them...because perhaps she understood that people generally have a reason they bite.

All of this deep thinking comes about today as product of something that happened in one of my 5th grade classes. Today, we were reviewing for a test next week. One of their words is "bandage," so I was trying to get them to use it in a sentence. They create sentences that are very basic such as, "I like bandages," or "he has a bandage." While these sentences are correct, I am trying t get them to expand the sentences and include context. I began giving examples using the students. I would say something like, "Johnny fell this morning so he has a bandage on his knee." They would all giggle and smile about being chosen or what I said happened. I used one little boy for an example who was being rather shy. I did this in hopes that it would bring him into the class review game we were doing and give him a sense of belonging, but boy, did I fail. Instead, I humiliated and confused him. After saying his name in the sentence, he got a very shocked expression on his face. It quickly became evident that his English was extremely poor and he had no idea what I was saying. As is custom when their name is called to read something/answer, he stood up and looked at me, not understanding why the other children were laughing (as they had been at the other sentences). One of his classmates said something to help convey that I wasn't calling on him, but I feel the damage was done, and his mind I just led a whole class to mock and laugh at him--nowhere near my intentions.

There is an interesting difference between Western and eastern culture when it comes to learning styles. There is something similar to pride called "face," or saving face, where ones legitimacy is often based on public interactions. The difference though is that once face is lost, it can't necessarily be gained back. This is why there is such high suicide rates in many Asian countries. Although school children of this age are not as concerned with face as older kids/adults are, I think it is still very real. I try to balance saving face with discipline, but I find it very difficult. My first class has horrible discipline because it's clear their Chinese teacher who helps me demands little control from them. They have name tents that sit on their desk, and they often are drawing on them and coloring them. Today during our test review, I finally got tired of it (and I was tired in general because it was morning) and I took a highlighter, a notebook, and a drawing from 3 students. It's so hard to establish authority or teach most effectively when you're only there 1 class a week. Either way, I hope that as this year continues, I get a better feel for my students and a better understanding on how to influence each one educationally and personally in the most positive way. With over 300 students of different backgrounds and age groups, I find this a huge challenge I face. I suppose this is kind of like relationships in general--just as how I opened this blog. As a rule, selflessness seems to be most effective in promoting the good of others when you don't understand them and to help you understand them...the paradox is that it's easiest to be selfless when you understand them and why they do things the way they do. This contradicts a lot of what our American values teach us--fight for what is yours. I cant argue with that necessarily. I suppose, as my brilliant mother likes to tell me, 'balance is key.'

Now for a comic relief of sorts...what's with all the serious talk!?!?

Picture of the day today is of the golden arches. That's right, McD's. You might notice in the background a sign that says Big Mac Meal $20!!! What?!? It's 20MOP actually, they use the dollar symbol. 8MOP-1USD, so it's actually about $2.50 USD for a Big Mac Meal. Bargain...and I'm sure they use only the highest quality ingredients...

That's all she wrote, folks.